Wasn't Supposed To Happen
by ReversedSam
Summary: Their relationship wasn't meant to be like this. It's femmeslash, don't read if that ain't your thing. COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimers: They're not mine, but I promise I'll have them back by  
midnight.**

A/N: All mistakes and British spellings are mine.  


**Wasn't Supposed To Happen**

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I wasn't supposed to fall in love with you, of that I'm sure. But I have. 

Our relationship has always been antagonistic at best. We always seemed to annoy each other, aggravate each other, get on each others nerves.

Until that day, in the midst of a huge argument, one minute I'm shouting at you, next I'm pinning you to my office door. I poured all my anger and frustration in that kiss. I wasn't gentle, and neither we're you, I dominated your mouth, using lips, teeth and tongue to convey the things that words have always failed to get across.

I didn't ask permission, I simply took what I wanted; I tore your clothes from your body and took you, on my terms. I took you hard and fast, right there on my desk. A feral grin in place the whole time as I watched you arch, watched your hips buck and heard your breath catch as I made your body shudder.

I felt a little ashamed at how it made me feel. Proud. Because I knew from then on you'd have to live with the knowledge that I made you come, me, the woman you hated, and you had the marks to prove it.

That is until you turned the tables; threw me up against the wall and made me scream your name.

Afterwards I don't know who was more shocked. Neither of us spoke as we quietly dressed. You didn't say a word as you left my office, and I didn't either.

We didn't say a word to each other for a month. Even when we worked together we barely spoke. I was confused as hell. I didn't want to talk to you, if I did it would make it real and I was quite happy to forget about it. I didn't care why you didn't speak to me, I was just glad you didn't.

As the days went by I thought more and more about it, I tried not to, but it seemed by body took great pleasure in giving me reminders every time you were around.

Reminders of how I responded to your touch, reminders of how much you satisfied me, reminders of how hard you made me come.

I couldn't help but notice how long your legs are or how perfect your ass is. I couldn't help but look a little longer than I should have whenever you wore a tight top. My eyes would linger on every one of your curves as I remembered what they felt like.

I wasn't supposed to want you, but I did.

Oh don't get me wrong, it was just physical, you still annoyed the crap out of me but I couldn't deny the physical attraction I was feeling for you. Although I'd never have admitted it to anyone but myself.

Then one day you turned up at my door, declaring that we needed to sort this out, we had to work together and needed to stop acting like kids.

I didn't give you chance to finish, I kissed you instead, then just like that day in my office, we fucked, crude I know, but that's what it was, fucking. Right there in my hallway, and I loved every second of it.

You didn't stick around afterwards and I didn't want you to. I had what I wanted and I'm sure you did as well.

So that's how it started, and that's how it continued. We didn't argue any more, whenever tension started to build between us we fucked. In the car, in the locker room, in my office, at your apartment, at my house, on the sofa, on the kitchen table, up against the walls, in bed.

The release from the tensions of work was just what we both needed. We took what we wanted from each other then left. Don't get me wrong, the sex was fantastic, hot as hell, and I took pride in how I made your body react, I didn't do it to please you though, and I know it was the same for you. I loved leaving my mark on your body, leaving you reminders of our encounters and it seemed you felt the same.

There was no tenderness, no talking beyond moans and cries in the heat of the moment, we didn't hang around for cuddles and small talk afterwards. This was purely physical. As unhealthy as it was, our 'relationship' was something I was perfectly happy with.

Until that day at your apartment, we'd had a particularly hard case and both needed the release. So I fucked you up against your front door as soon as we walked in. Then we ended up in the shower, finally in bed.

I think I must have passed out from exhaustion. Usually you wake me after a while when that happens, then I leave, but you didn't that day. So when I woke, I was in your arms. It took me a second to figure out where I was.

You were holding me so close, my head resting on your shoulder, our legs tangled, my arm draped across your stomach. I was shocked by how right it felt, how much I didn't want to move. I desperately wanted to wake you with gentle kisses.

My own feelings confused the hell out of me. But I knew the rules of this relationship, so I left, left you sleeping without so much as a goodbye note.

But as the weeks past I couldn't help myself, I started noticing things I never had before. Like how soft your skin is, how gorgeous your eyes are, how much I love your smile.

I pushed my feelings to the side and tried to stay away from you for a while, get over whatever was going on with me, but it didn't work. I cursed myself for feeling like that, what we had was working perfectly for us.

The next time we ended up in bed it was completely different for me. Our encounters had always been about self gratification, taking what we needed. Not this time.

Again I found myself noticing things. Like how much it turned me on when you whimpered and when you moaned into my mouth. How much I loved hearing you moan. How hot it was when you wrapped those long legs around me. I noticed how much I wanted to please you, how good you tasted, but mostly I noticed how badly I wanted to fall asleep in your arms.

I thought for weeks about all these new feelings, fighting them and trying to deny them until I realized, I wasn't supposed to be falling in love with you. But I was.

I had no idea what to do about this new revelation of mine. I thought over and over again about telling you, but talking wasn't exactly something we did a lot of.

I found it somewhat funny how I could do things to your body that would astonish a porn star but couldn't bring myself to talk to you.

I wanted more but I was afraid of losing the tiny part of you I did have.

I knew I'd end up getting hurt when you found someone you actually wanted to be with, but I couldn't call you on it. We'd never acted as though this was a relationship, never had any claim on one another. So I had no right to get upset when you decided to move on, decided physicality just wasn't enough for you any more.

Then the next time we found ourselves alone you stopped me mid kiss, not something that had ever happened before. You told me you couldn't do this, it wasn't working for you any more, it had to stop.

I was devastated when you left. I wanted to make you explain, tell me why, but I knew I had no right. Just because I'd let myself fall for you; that was my problem.

So I stayed the hell away from you, it was worse than before, we argued and fought like cat and dog. All the while I wanted you so badly it hurt. But I kept it to myself, refused to make my stupidity your problem.

I took time off, decided to pamper myself for a few days in a vain attempt to forget about you. I booked myself into a spa, there's a million and one to choose from in Vegas. I left Lindsey with my sister and took off.

I'd only been there a day when I decided it wasn't going to work, pampering yourself was all well and good, but not when it left me with hours free; hours I spent thinking about you.

Then completely out of the blue you turned up, I didn't even think you knew where I was. To say I was surprised is an understatement of titanic proportions. I was shocked as hell.

You looked nervous, even more so when I invited you in.

You told me you wanted to talk; you had decided you couldn't take the arguments and fighting any more.

Nervousness practically radiated from you as you told me you felt you owed me an explanation. I knew what you meant, but I didn't want to push you. Especially since I didn't want you to explain, I was sure you wanted to tell me you'd met someone, that's why we couldn't carry on as we had been.

A huge part of me wanted to run, if I didn't know the truth, it couldn't break my heart.

So we sat and I listened as you spoke, watched you fidget and look away as the nerves affected you. I nodded in all the right places and mentally prepared myself for whatever you were about to say. I knew I'd cry. I just hoped I'd be able to hold it in until you left. I refused to make you feel bad about this.

Then it came, I braced myself as you said 'I couldn't let things between us continue like that because...'

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	2. Chapter 2

**Figured I'd get this part up quick, that cliffhanger was evil. **

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The rest of the words left your mouth in a rush, you didn't look at me as you spoke and I sat in stunned silence as I took in your words, as I let them wash over me. I don't even think I was breathing, I couldn't move, my brain stopped functioning and I sat there dumbfounded. This I was not prepared for. 

I didn't speak for a while, I couldn't find my voice. I watched as your nervousness increased with every second I was silent.

When I finally did find my voice it was shaky as I asked you to repeat yourself, said I didn't want to have any misunderstandings. So I listened again and I watched your mouth as you spoke.

I felt my whole body fill with sheer elation as you said. "I couldn't carry on like that because I've fallen in love with you. I don't know how and I never meant for it to happen but it has and I need more, I need all of you or I need to move on".

I knew I'd cry but tears of joy were not what I was expecting. You looked shocked at my reaction even more so when I explained I'd fallen for you too.

I told you I'd fallen for you months ago but I didn't know what to do about it. I'd pretty much decided to do the opposite of what she had just done. I told you how thankful I was that you decided to handle it differently than me. That you'd told me how you felt. I have to say I was shocked, everyone thinks I'm the confident one. Not this time.

The rest of the conversation is a bit of a blur to me now, I had too many emotions swirling inside and I was too busy trying to deal with them to remember the exact words we said.

I do remember the rest of that weekend though. It was amazing. After we talked I moved in to kiss you but you stopped me. Told me with a smile that I had to wait till after our first date. I laughed at the ludicrousness of that, then you told me I wouldn't have to wait long.

You left telling me you'd be back soon, so I waited impatiently for your return marvelling at the huge about turn we'd just done.

When you came back twenty minutes later you were armed with champagne, strawberries and bath oils.

I couldn't shake the huge grin as we ordered room service and actually had dinner together. We sat, talked, laughed and shared things, all the things I had wanted us to do for months. It felt so natural being with you like that, as if that's how we'd always been.

Then you led me to the bathroom and with a mischievous smile you ordered me into the bath. I watched your eyes dance over my skin as I shed my clothes; I took my time, slowly revealing myself to you. And I felt amazed. Had you always looked at me like that? Like I was the most beautiful thing you'd ever seen? Had your eyes always darkened with desire at the mere sight of me like this?

We soaked in the bath as we drank champagne and fed each other strawberries. I got my kiss and it was amazing, nothing like any of the kisses we'd shared before. This was a slow, gentle exploration. You slowly teased my tongue with yours; making me gasp and whimper into your talented mouth.

You said that you liked my taste much better than the strawberries and I blushed at your words, at the husk in your voice as you spoke them.

Afterwards in nothing but our bathrobes we curled up on the huge bed and talked again. I asked when your feelings changed, when you started wanting more. You said it was that night in your apartment, when I'd fallen asleep you felt the overwhelming urge to hold me, that you hadn't meant to fall asleep but you couldn't bring yourself to let me go. I think I cried again as I realised how much time we'd wasted. How we'd been so stupid.

Then you kissed me again. Your kisses are so gentle and so intense, they take my breath away. I think I'm addicted to your kisses; I crave the feel of your mouth on mine.

That night was the first time we made love and my god it was amazing.

You slowly slipped the robe off my shoulders; your hands gently caressed my body, gliding over me. You used your hands and mouth to map out every single inch; you found every place that makes me moan and lavished it with attention. All the while telling me how beautiful I am, how much you love touching me, how in love with me you are. When I felt you kissing your way down my trembling body and claiming me with your mouth I thought I was going to pass out, the feeling of your hot tongue inside me was almost too much.

Sounds strange I know, considering this was hardly the first time we'd done this, but never before had it been like this. Before had always been rushed heat of the moment sex, nothing more. Never before had we softly and gently made love to each other.

When I touched you I was almost overwhelmed. I did as I'd wanted to for so long. I teased your body with soft touches, kisses and licks, gentle bites to all the hot spots I found. I took my time learning your body and figuring out how to please you. Loving every reaction I got, every whimper and moan I heard.

I revelled in the fact that this wasn't about sex, this was about expressing how much I feel for you, about making you feel good. I didn't have to rush. And I knew you weren't going anywhere after.

When your body finally gave in to the pleasure, you arched into my hands and moaned my name; I was amazed at how much it made me feel. Yes I'd seen it before, but again, never like this. Everything was different now.

Afterwards you held me in your arms, told me how much you loved me and how you never wanted to let me go.

This was how it should have been all along.

Thinking back over the months before, the hurt and pain we'd put ourselves through I realise I wouldn't change a thing, not a single second; if I did I might not be with you now.

All that happened a year ago and we're still together, you moved in a few months ago and still now, a year later I smile every time I wake up in your arms.

So now we're back to the arguing in work, only difference is we go home and make up.

I can't quite believe how far we've come, especially given the start to our relationship.

It was my birthday today, you wrote on my card 'I wasn't supposed to fall in love with you, but I did, and every day I love you more'

I think that sums our relationship up perfectly.

It wasn't supposed to happen.

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